Getting Out of the Friend Zone In 7 Easy Steps

by Gavin Ferenzo

Here's a typical scenario of how the friend zone situation is for most guys:

You meet a girl. You hit it off pretty well. You start being friends. You kinda feel that she kinda has a thing for you, but you're too scared to make a move. You get an opportunity to take the relationship to the next level, but you're still too scared so you don't do anything. Time passes. You're still friends. You have a great time whenever you're together, and you're closer than ever with each other. When you FINALLY do get the courage to say or do something, she delivers the ultimate blow: “I just want to be friends.”

So now you're trying to find out how to get out of the friend zone and stay out of it, for good.

Is there any hope for you? Fortunately, the answer is a resounding “YES!”

For most guys, getting out of the friend zone usually means that you had a chance at the beginning, but then somehow, some way, for some reason or the other, YOU BLEW IT. You took a wrong turn somewhere, and ended up in the dreaded friend zone.

I've landed in the friend zone MANY TIMES ever since I started liking girls. So what do you do now? Here, I'm going to share with you my simple 7-step process on how to get out of the friend zone.

1.) Accept the reality of the situation.

No begging or pleading for her to give you a chance. She made a conscious decision to not be anything more than friends with you, and no amount of convincing will change her mind. Instead, we're going to approach the situation by working on her irrational and illogical side. Don't withdraw yourself, but you'll do much better if you start putting less focus on her and more focus on you at this stage of the process.

2.) Improve yourself.

There is no single person in this world who can't use a touch of self-improvement. Start lifting weights. Start eating healthy. Learn something new. Try out some sports. Get that adrenaline pumping through your veins. Trust me, you'll feel much better about yourself and gain more self-confidence, and you'll look better in the process (if you decide to work out).

3.) Have fun with other people.

You cannot and should not put all your eggs in one basket, EVER. Start meeting some people. Your friends have friends who have friends of their own — work different social circles. Meet girls and learn how to flirt well. Ironically, the more women you meet, the better you will do with the girl you're trying to escape the friend zone with. The more jealous she gets, the better.

4.) Ask her out on a Non-Date.

Now the game begins. If she's hesitant to go out with you on one-to-one basis, start asking her out on Non-Dates. A Non-Date is basically a get-together where you ask her to accompany you doing something that you would do anyway. Something like picking up some books, buying some new clothes, etc. She's more likely to go with you than if you ask her to go to dinner.

5.) Flirt with her.

The number one reason guys can't get out of the friend zone is because they don't realize that it's a matter of sexual attraction; or rather, the lack of it. So start teasing her playfully. Start with playful compliments until you can eventually move on to flirting that's more sexual in nature. If I notice that she put on some perfume, my favorite line is, “You cannot wear that perfume around me any more, because I'm afraid that one of these days I won't be able to hold control myself and do something BAD.”

6.) Emphasize your sexuality.

If you failed to make a move before, then you can't be Mr. Touchy all of a sudden — she'll know what your doing. Start slow with casual touches on the arm, or the small of her back. Then graduate to hugs. If she talks about other guys, then talk about other girls and be very graphic. Make sure that she knows that you are a man who doesn't repress his sexual urges (it's okay!).

7.) Make your move.

If you do steps 5-7 well enough, you will find that you'll be gradually escalating. Your flirting becomes more sexual by nature, she starts being touchier with you, and your dates become more serious. By the time that this happens, you have done well. To accomplish your mission of getting out of the friend zone, you MUST make your move. There is no way in hell that she is going to be making the first move, but she will be giving you hints that it's okay to do something now. Do not be a fool and miss this second chance! When opportunity knocks, open the door and pounce on it.

And that's it! I know it's VERY simplified, but that's the basic process that you must follow from beginning to end if you want to know how to get out of the friend zone. It took me many years and even more heartbreaks to finally figure it out, but this very process has worked MIRACULOUSLY for me every single time I have applied it.


Gavin Ferenzo runs getoutofthefriendzone.com which teaches men the important principles of attracting women who have put them in the dreaded "friend zone." Visit the site and discover the exact step-to-step process of how to get out of the friend zone today!