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Author
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Topic: Just friends : GAME OVER.
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Don Juan
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posted 08-21-2001 04:57 AM
   
Everyone heard The Treatment a number of times : "let's just be friends".It's hard to hear because women have no idea of the guts it takes to ask them out. They put men off this way, which can hide several meanings that can be translated more or less in the following : "I'm not interested in you but I appreciate the way you court me and I would like you to continue." Most of the time they do not intend to become our friends because friendship is something that require an exchange. Easy to test : accept and ask anything in return (even a phone call "you call me next time"), you'll never get it. They just want to suck you for more attention.
Then, friendship is something that happens, not something planned. Did you ever said to your friends in older times that you PLANNED to become friends with them ? Any woman using this line does not deserve to become a friend of mine. Because she does not plan to become a friend. Because she relies on my feelings to get my attention while not caring for me nor providing anything in return. Because she lies, because she tries to manipulate me, because she think I am not man enough to handle the truth or too shy to tell it. Like telling me bull**** was not hurting my feelings. Therefore, I refuse. When I hear those words and recognize them for what they mean, I usually stare and smile for a couple of seconds and reply "Thanks, but I already have plenty." (which is true). Then I wish goodbye and walk away. Bear in mind that if you receive The Treatment you ALREADY LOST. There is nothing left to save. Yet many men sadly accept the deal in a foolish hope to turn it later into something more, or to keep within reach the target of their shattered feelings. Some of them are even cynical enough to think that the lady will connect them with her female friends - be sure then that prior to this unlikely meeting the "friend" will be presented as a lame looser wimp. At least if you refuse, you'll recover most of the proudness lost in rejection, and you will act like a man, able to handle. Don't be rude, don't yell, just refuse, politely. It will bring you respect and a clean cut. Kotrin
IP: 57.66.136.34 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 08-21-2001 11:56 AM
Just to add to Kotrins comments. Unless you REALLY TRULY ARE ok with being friends (that means without the expectation that it'll turn into something more), take the hint and move on.Kane IP: 198.39.6.173 |
Administrator
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posted 08-21-2001 09:38 PM
Moving to Tips forum.IP: 24.25.68.217 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 08-22-2001 12:08 AM
LJBF. Is there a more dishonest line in the universe that is as geared to fleece the listener and aggrandize the speaker..................?I think not. Least not in a non-election year. lc IP: 63.211.244.44 |
Moderator
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posted 08-22-2001 02:43 AM
When I get the LJBF (or anything similar to it, for that matter) I say: "Do guys still fall for that line?" Then walk away. It's a shocker, and even if it doesn't get your chances back up, it sure can't hurt.  ------------------
Please remember to use the "SEARCH" function in this forum on the topic you have questions about before asking, because it most likely has been answered already! Thank you. The DJ Bible http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000512.html IP: 63.224.223.56 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 08-22-2001 07:24 AM
Yep, I had a lady give me the LJBF Treatment when I asked her to be my girlfriend. She added: "Let's make everything the way it was before, OK?" I replied, "Good, let's forget this ever happened." Her answer: "No, no. We'll make everything back to the way it was."I was such a SUCKER!!! I still followed her like a sick, hurt, mommyless poor little puppy. I'd be so surprised if she still has any hint of respect for me. So I'd like to add this. Some girls still think that the LJBF is too harsh for the little sick, hurt, mommyless poor little puppies, Average Frustrated Chumps (AFCs). So they might add a line like that: "Everything will remain as it was, OK?" Believe it, people: it doesn't because she allready knows about your feelings for her. She already saw you giving your heart to her and she already pushed it into the shredder and saw it come out like a disgusting hamburger from hell. It will never be as it was. IP: 131.169.230.73 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 09-06-2001 02:26 PM
Bump * DJB material?thnx,
-Neo IP: 212.239.187.119 |
Don Juan
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posted 09-08-2001 09:52 AM
Meatball summarised it beautifully.
Do yourself a favour. Cut your losses, break off contact and let time heal your wounds.
You can't recover from LJBF. I've tried.IP: 144.138.83.96 |
Moderator
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posted 09-08-2001 08:20 PM
Yeah Neo this is DJB material.------------------
http://www.deardiary.net/cgi-bin/viewer.cgi?diary=3874 IP: 66.65.106.166 |
Don Juan
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posted 09-08-2001 09:54 PM
LJBF is the most polite way of a girl telling you that she wishes you'd just get lost.....>>>BJB IP: 24.140.2.124 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 09-09-2001 04:04 AM
Girls don't say "lets just be friends" to be easier on US. They say it so things are easier on THEM. Too many girls are affraid that they will be concidered impolite. Not only are they too affraid to approach, they are too affraid to end things. This is just another reason why we are superior to them  IP: 216.249.91.151 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 09-09-2001 06:36 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Shiftkey:
Girls don't say "lets just be friends" to be easier on US. They say it so things are easier on THEM. Too many girls are affraid that they will be concidered impolite. Not only are they too afraid to approach, they are too affraid to end things. This is just another reason why we are superior to them
I agree wholeheartedly. Most of the things women do in dealing with men are for selfish purposes. Unfortunately, women don't consciously realize this fact. Indeed, it is rare for women to take responsibility for their choices. On the other hand, it's pretty rare for men to do the same. But when they do, that is when a meaningful relationship is possible. ------------------
It could happen to you, just like it happened to me, there is simply no immunity, there's no guarantee... IP: 209.246.40.222 |
Don Juan
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posted 09-09-2001 08:33 PM
Sorry to disappoint to boys, but mr. bond is correct. If we really told most of you that we did not want to see you anymore then you would beg and plead for us to reconsider, which really makes us uncomfortable. I have had to tell a few guys this very thing over the years because I know his ego cannot take the truth. We are not afraid to end things. We are just sometimes afraid of your reaction to our wanting to end things.I have approached several men. I wasn't afraid. They always seemed flattered that I showed interest. Many women are much more shy than you think, especially when we find a guy attractive. We want to make a good impression also. I like a strong, self confident man who isn't afraid to go after what he wants. Too bad more of you aren't that way!
Bye now,
Gwen
IP: 168.143.112.8 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 09-09-2001 08:38 PM
I like a strong, self confident man who isn't afraid to go after what he wants. Too bad more of you aren't that way!
Bye now,
GwenHmmm... My first reaction when I read the foregoing was, wow, were we just insulted? Then I realized Gwen was probably trying to say that the kind of guy she is looking for will never have to face a LJBF situation. Put simply, women wont't use the LJBF line if guys don't force them to use it. ------------------
It could happen to you, just like it happened to me, there is simply no immunity, there's no guarantee... [This message has been edited by Sting (edited 09-09-2001).] IP: 64.157.53.71 | |
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