posted 08-23-2000 02:50 PM            

Have you ever stop and think to wonder why most women seem to go after all the wrong guys for all the wrongs reasons? To completely end the mystery that perhaps many of you men in the group may have been wondering about for a while, most women absolutely DO go after jerks. But to say "jerk" is not a truly accurate description of the type of men these women go after.

Women go after men who are incredibly self-confident with women? -- No, not entirely. They go after the man who is not afraid of their p@ssy? (please forgive the blunt language) -- Not really, either. Well I think the truth is this: Women, more times than not, don't even know THEMSELVES what it is they are after. Very seldom do the ever stop to sit down and think of what kind of guy they would really like to have in their life. Their idea is ambiguous at best.

So it really comes down to this. Women just plainly and purely end up going after the guy who can make them feel the best. Period. The WAYS in which they are made to feel good by the guy(s) they ultimately select are irrelevant. That's where, and why, they get into trouble. In an instant gratification society, they just go after what turns them on the most, first. This is where the so-called "nice-guy" loses out (which is not an accurate description also). The so-called nice guy is generally not a smooth-talker. He does not come-on like he has loads and loads of great feelings and highs to spare, and generally not extrememly outspoken.

From women's viewpoint, this is taken in all sorts of erroneous ways that it probably shouldn't be taken. But that's life, and the legacy of the poor "nice-guy." In passing, it should be noted for the record, that not ALL women go after the so-called "jerk" types. Do you want to know which women do? Only the women you want. So in that light, you may as well say "all" of them, right?

When women continue to jack-over the guys they really should perhaps AT LEAST consider giving more of a chance to, these guys eventually, and usually quite quickly, begin to realize what kind of men the women they would like to have are going after. The result is that one day something just snaps inside of them, and they begin to emulate and become like the "jerks" that "most" women seem to love so much. In order to become that kind of man effectively, it usually has to be taken all the way to the end, for the "jerk" mindset would not be truly established if it were not. What that amounts to is becoming the "jerk" that smooth talks women and turns them on in many ways by showing that they have loads and loads of great feelings and highs to spare all for the woman. And in the end, after they have been promptly jacked, the guy dumps them.

Why? Because that is the jerk's, and the women who go after jerks, legacy. So when women inadvertently, or purposely, create so-called "jerks" out of so-called "nice guys", they are just inadvertently f@cking over other women, their own kind.

posted 08-23-2000 08:49 PM            

If women really wanted nice guys, then they'd be fighting over the nice guys and coming after them from across the country. Instead they go after the rich and/or good looking guys, or guys with status. But nice guys just don't thrill them. So they don't go after them.

posted 08-23-2002 07:29 AM            

To use a Gio-esque phrase; ALL people, female AND male, have a biological urge to go after (and/or choose) those that excite them. Since attraction is all about adrenaline, that's not hard to understand.

Does niceness in men produce surges of adrenaline in women? No. Does niceness in WOMEN cause surges of adrenaline in MEN? NO.

Why did I bold that last part? Because it occurred to me that, for all that you men scream about women not flinging themselves at nice men, there's no indication whatsoever that any of YOU are flinging yourselves at nice WOMEN. In fact, although there are countless posts about female beauty, how you define it, how you rate it, and most of all how you get it and keep it (not to mention threads on breasts, weight and the different ethnic groups' special sorts of physical appeal), how often on this site is there any mention of NICENESS as a desirable quality in women, or one that matters in the slightest? (And no, complaining about b!tches does NOT count as asking for niceness.)

Frankly, guys, if you don't care about niceness in women, it's hypocritical to expect them to value it in YOU.

Do some women spurn nice guys in favor of jerks? Sure.... just as you men are stampeding past nice WOMEN to get to the hot-looking b!tches that are all you care to try for.

Do you want to attract someone? Then you've gotta turn them on, plain and simple. If you have great physical beauty, you're set. If not, confidence, style, intelligence, humor, being a great conversationalist and an interesting person can work for you much of the time... and it doesn't hurt to understand a little psychology, naturally.

When you start looking for an LTR, keep in mind that mature people can make choices based on things BESIDES biological urges, and quality women will be looking for a wide range of virtues in you, niceness included, as YOU should be looking for in THEM. Would you really WANT a woman who did NOT think that niceness was a requirement for an LTR? I'd be AFRAID of a person like that, LOL!!

There's NO need whatsoever to stop being nice, whatever your gender; as long as you have some sparkle to you, and aren't an @ss-kisser, you'll attract plenty of people, if you just give them the chance to check you out. :-)

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To discourage flaming, I will NEVER return to a thread once I've posted there. To well-wishers; sorry!! To all others; :-P

The truth will set you free..... but first, it'll REALLY p!ss you off.

"You make a living by what you get. But you make a life by what you give." -- Winston Churchill

posted 08-23-2002 08:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Princess-Spock:
. [b]Does niceness in WOMEN cause surges of adrenaline in MEN? NO.

Why did I bold that last part? Because it occurred to me that, for all that you men scream about women not flinging themselves at nice men, there's no indication whatsoever that any of YOU are flinging yourselves at nice WOMEN.
[/B]

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posted 08-23-2002 11:41 PM            

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Originally posted by Secrets:

Just so you know, you are completely WRONG. A nice woman is EXACTLY what I'm looking for. Both in looks(petite,cute, girl next door kind of looks) and personality(polite, doesn't swear, doesn't yell and argue over any little thing) Do you know how hard it is to find a girl that type? And yes, meeting this type of girl gives me an adrenaline rush. Problem is, I have never met a single girl that is that type. These are the type of girls that marry their first boyfriend, usually before the age of 21 and they STAY married. I recently met two women that were my type and they were both married. The first was married at the age of 19, the other at only 17. If you know any woman that truely matches my definition of Nice please let me know, I'll ask her out.

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posted 08-24-2002 06:01 PM            

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Originally posted by pilot0001:

I think its more of a maturity thing. You want someone who's mature.

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I don't like using the term mature because most people associate age with maturity and I have realized thru experience that that is not the case. I have known women in their 30's and 40's that were not as mature as some teenage girls I've known. I prefer the term nice because a girl that's nice is going to stay nice as they get older. A girl that's b!tchy is going to stay b!tchy as she gets older and may even become more b!tchy. Most people would assume she would mature as she got older but I have found that not to be true most of the time with only a few exceptions.

posted 08-25-2002 12:14 AM            

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Originally posted by Secrets:

Just so you know, you are completely WRONG. A nice woman is EXACTLY what I'm looking for. Both in looks(petite,cute, girl next door kind of looks) and personality(polite, doesn't swear, doesn't yell and argue over any little thing) Do you know how hard it is to find a girl that type? And yes, meeting this type of girl gives me an adrenaline rush. Problem is, I have never met a single girl that is that type. These are the type of girls that marry their first boyfriend, usually before the age of 21 and they STAY married. I recently met two women that were my type and they were both married. The first was married at the age of 19, the other at only 17. If you know any woman that truely matches my definition of Nice please let me know, I'll ask her out.

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posted 08-25-2002 03:26 PM            

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Originally posted by Kid Quick:
...Many women have tried so hard to be just like men that they have adopted crass language and behavior. If only they knew how huge a turnoff that is.

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posted 10-28-2002 02:54 PM            

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Originally posted by Secrets:

Exactly! I'm so sick of women who want to be men. Don't they understand that we want to date a woman, or more to the point, a true lady?

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