Occasionally, I will direct a question to the female subscribers in certain issues of The Don Juan Newsletter... help us "clueless" guys out a little so to speak. Here's what they have to say....
How Do You Let a Man Know that You're Interested in Him Romantically, and Not Just as a Friend?
Actually, Don Juaners, I enjoy telling a man forthrightly how I feel when he's near; the century doesn't matter. I tend to assume a "little girl" persona with playful talk, innuendo banter, and lots of gentle touching, especially his arms and hands. When he responds with his mind, then the body follows. I feel that it's cruel and unusual punishment to keep either a man or woman "guessing" about the next step. When I enjoy his company, I let him know in many different ways. I notice little details about the effort he is making and reinforce that behavior. For example, when he touches me, I tell him that that felt good; when he smiles, I tell him how wonderful that makes me feel; or when he's wearing a good color for himself, I tell him that he's got a good eye for color.
Every encounter between a man and a woman is fraught with the possibility of rejection. Remove that element, be yourself, and act on what you FEEL.
A guy can tell if I'm attracted to him definitely by my body language. I can't look a guy in the eyes (if I have the hots for him) for more than a couple seconds, and also I do act just a little nervous. Also I'll make up some dumb excuse to get his phone number (or I'll give him mine and ask him to help me study..heh.)
Usually, this method works. However, if a guy doesn't seem to be getting the drift, I'll be more physical with him. For instance, I'll draw something silly on his hand or write my name somewhere on some of his paper. After this, me and the guy form just a special little friendship, and then from there I keep on nudging and hinting until I get a date. The guy usually thinks they're the one to initiate it, but only because I play stupid when they say they have something to ask me.
The way to tell that I just want to be friends with a guy is that I get really physical with him and I'm a lot more blunt with him about other guy friends. There is really no specific thing I do, but here's a tip for most guys:
If you see a girl you like, don't wait a long time before asking her out. Then she starts to think of you more like a friend than someone she wants to go out with. At least that's how it is with me and MY friends. If you are just nice and direct, the girl most likely won't say no (but start off small). For me it's hard to turn guys down who are really sweet and direct!
But anyway, if I really want a guy, he won't be the one who has to find ME.
I tend to become unable to speak intelligently at all, and I also blush excessively when he is near me.
If I am attracted to a man, I will tell him! "I think you are very handsome!" Keep in mind this has to be sincere! Nothing breaks the ice like a strong woman who knows exactly what she wants, and what man would argue with that?! Every man wants to know that the person he is with finds him attractive, so... tell him, then it is up to him to peruse further. If nothing else, you just made his month, and boosted his ego to the size of Texas! No matter what, he will never forget you!
Well, I do like to cut to the chase. As I never am at a loss for men, when I fancy a guy I first give him my business card and asks if he has one. Then I inquire whether he has a girlfriend. If he does, I let him know how lucky she is and move on (no cheaters for me). See, if he is not "single" at this time, perhaps he will be in the future and recall my card and be wise enough to call me. If he is "single", after exchanging cards, I tell him DIRECTLY - "I really like you!" And let him know that WHEN he calls me, if he gets my machine, please leave a message and I will call him back. If I really am into him and he doesn't call in about 2 weeks, I will call him. However, any man that does not phone me after I have been so direct is often either self-absorbed, foolish, or afraid (?) - major turn-offs. Therefore, the purpose of my calling the guy who doesn't call me is to feel out his reason for not calling and if it's one of the above - forgetaboutit!
If I like a guy I will be quiet around him. But if I don't, I will talk when I have something to say.
I FLIRT! LOL and am attentive, and funny and touch his arm or leg so lightly. Sit or stand a little closer, let him get a whiff of my hair and my perfume. I sit and stand taller, lean toward him, making sure my breasts are noticed without being vulgar. I look him in the eye deeply then look away smiling. I ask direct questions if it feels right. I lick my lips and make sure I look good.
If he's just a friend, I might still flirt a little but I don't treat him much differently than a woman friend.
I become feline in nature when I want someone I see. I feel sleek, sexy. I think "Samantha" from Sex In The City shows it the best. puuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrr.
I went to the doctor's office today after work. There was a tall, slim doctor who kept smiling, not that big toothy smile...that..."Hello...." smile LOL. I made sure that I looked right at him and smiled back. As I was leaving, he said goodnight and came to open the door for me. I may never see him again, but the back and forth flirt was fun.
